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Presence, by Patsy Rodenburg, Penguin, 2009
Patsy Rodenburg , OBE, is well known for her work in the corporate world and in theatre, including the RSC and the National Theatre. She uses this reputation and experience, she is one of the worlds leading voice and acting coaches, to help people from a wide variety of professions to project themselves with confidence and authority.
Having already written a number of books on communication skills, performance and voice work, all of which have become established texts, this is her first book on the subject of presence and personal impact. As may be expected from someone of her standing and reputation, it is much more than a simple self help book or airport management guide. This is an important text, grounded in a lifetime’s experience, which is likely to remain in print for many years to come.
What is presence?
Rodenburg starts with the principle that we are all born with a natural presence and connection to the world and other people, but that this is flattened out of us through the knocks, challenges and upsets of life.
Presence is about energy and connection. It is an energy that fully connects us to the world and to other people. It is thus a two way process of giving and receiving. We give energy and we receive it back. If we are clear, aware and attentive, this can often be felt as a small jolt or “frisson”. You know when you have connected with someone, because you can see the impact of your presence in their reaction. We need to be present in order to fully experience life and intimacy.
How do you spot it?
People give evidence of presence in innumerable different ways. An important indicator is their posture and the way they hold themselves and move within a space. Voice is another strong clue. The use of volume, clarity, timbre, expressiveness and resonance can fully engage people’s attention or undermine an otherwise compelling message. Correct breathing is also at the heart of presence. It is a skill that we have all been ceaselessly practicing since birth, but few of us have fully mastered. Indeed, when we are under pressure it is inappropriate breathing that most usually undermines us.
People with presence appear fully alive, exquisitely aware of being in the moment, with a sense of connection, spontaneity and freedom. It is about acute sensory awareness, a non verbal sensing of what is happening here and now, being fully conscious of what is going on outside and in, but in a non judgemental way.
We need to be present to fully listen. Equally, it is characterised by clear, intuitive and quick thinking, a generosity of spirit and, according to Rodenburg, sheer bravery.
In short, presence is energy of body, breath, voice, mind, heart and spirit.
When is presence diminished?
Presence is weakened and energy is diminished when negativity outweighs positivity. Among the factors that rob us of our presence Rodenburg cites: carelessness, slouching, shallow breathing, an underpowered voice, uninformed thinking, mocking and cynicism.
Presence is also quite simply knocked out of us because life is too hard. We unplug from our experience in order to stop the pain. If the knocks and pain are too great, we can find that, from an early age, we stay disconnected for the rest of our life.
She also argues that we tend to close down in crowds and are usually more present in rural surroundings. What is more, many modern comforts obstruct presence. To quote the Hopi Indians, if life gets too easy, you lose your joy.
The three circles model
At the heart of the book is the three circles model that she has trained to great and good for many years. It is a simple, powerful and intuitive model, that gives clear and practical guidance about what to do to become fully present, and how to recognise when we are not.
The first circle is the circle of self and withdrawal, the third is circle of bluff and force, and the third circle, the one in which we can connect to and be fully present with others, she calls the circle of energy and connecting. The trick is to know from which circle you normally interact with people and the world in given situations, to actively choose which circle you wish to inhabit at each moment, and to spend as much time as possible operating from circle two.
Circle one – the circle of self and withdrawal
Here a person’s whole focus is inwards. People in circle one tend to be energy sinks, absorbing other people’s energy and draining rather than enlivening them. Indeed they often come across to other people as self centred, uncaring and withdrawn, and not very observant. They often alternate between feeling left out and feeling self conscious, and have a tendency to wear clothes that help them to disappear.
Although they have learned to disappear and not be noticed, and are frequently ignored and not missed when they leave the room, circle one people are still vulnerable to being victimised. Those who spend too long in this circle find their passion for life is dulled and they are often described in popular parlance as “shy”. However, in the face of a potentially threatening situation, or if you just want to be alone in a crowd, this can on occasions be an appropriate circle to operate from.
Evidence that you are operating from circle one includes people leaning forward to hear or notice you, or asking you to repeat when you speak. You may also find yourself withdrawing physically from people, feelings or ideas, and holding your breath or breathing rapidly or shallowly.
Circle three – the circle of bluff and force
When operating in this circle energy is certainly being projected outwards in abundance, but it rarely fully connects with anything or anyone. There is a real sense of physical force, but it is non specific and non targeted. People like this are spraying energy out into the world, they may get a loose connection, but they certainly miss the nuances. Rodenburg points out that such people are often good at getting parties started and rallying the troops, but they are often strangely alone. People tire of them.
It is difficult not to notice such people as they often take up more space than they need, speak too loud, laugh too loud and often even breathe too loud, pulling air into their body and taking oxygen from others. Other clues are that they wear clothes that get them noticed, take command of a conversation, even when they have only heard a fragment, do not notice if people have not been enjoying the situation as much as they have, and feel they have to inject energy into every social event, even at the price of self and others.
A good clue that you are operating in this circle is when you do not really notice the people you are talking to, or even the room you are in, but you may notice that people are starting to withdraw or make space for you.
Helpfully, Rodenburg argues that most male on male contact is in third.
Circle two – the circle of energy and connecting
Here energy is focused, it moves out towards the object of attention, touches it and receives energy back. People who are interacting with each other in second react and communicate freely and spontaneously, they respond and adjust to each other like dancers and this begets intimacy.
According to Rodenburg, you know you are in second when you feel centred and alert, you feel your body belongs to you and you can fully feel the earth through your feet. You know you can reach people and they hear you when you speak. Equally, you notice details in others, their eyes, their moods, their anxieties. You are also curious about ideas rather than judgemental, you hear people clearly, acknowledge the feelings of others, and see, hear, smell and connect with all that is around you.
So how do you move into second circle
Sadly, moving into second circle and staying there, especially during times of stress and pressure, is not as simple as understanding the nature and benefits of second circle behaviour and then actively choosing to avoid interacting from the other two. Most of our energy habits have been developed years ago for our protection. Our counterproductive behaviour has a positive intention, it has developed to protect us and to avoid pain. This pattern of behaviour may now be archaic and unwanted, but it is hard wired. This means that releasing a different and perhaps more real self takes courage and some discomfort.
When we meet the point of impasse and frustration, this means that we are stuck on the threshold between change and old habits. The time when we fell most pulled back into old habits is the time at which persistence will be rewarded. From thereon in, the new habit will itself start to become hard wired and part of our repertoire. To start to be consciously competent with a simple behavioural change will take at least 30 days, but by then you have added real behavioural flexibility and choice. To be unconsciously competent takes ten times as long, a little like learning to drive after passing your test.
To move from third to second may feel as though you are relinquishing power, but all you are really giving up is brute force. If you persist, you will find surprising qualities in other people and your status will start to grow. In moving from first to second life will have more texture, colour and fun.
Getting out of your head and into your body
Most of us are riddled with habits that block our present energy, habits that disconnect us from our body and our body from the world. It has, indeed, been argued that most western executives are dead from the neck down. In second circle,
senses and sense flow through the body. The body is centred and available, allowing energy to pass through.
The best way to enter this state, suggests Rodenburg, is to remember times when you were walking in nature, on a beach, riding a bike, doing hard physical work, fully participating in sport, or other similarly physically engaging activities between consenting adults. Or even better than trying to remember, just do it!
Practical exercises to develop presence
The book is also stuffed full of practical exercises and activities to develop presence, most of them adapted from proven theatre techniques. It would not be fair or practical to list them all here. If what you have read of the core principles of this book has engaged you, I would recommend you buy the book and throw yourself into the exercises. Once again, I must stress that this is not a lightweight self help book, she uses these techniques with Dame Judy Dench and numerous other actors and leaders of her stature. If it’s good enough for Dame Judy … !
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